Spreading the Word

Every time I speak, write, or talk about living with Stage IV cancer, it seems I am educating an entire public. This week, I got to go on TV to discuss the cover of my Spring issue, on which I posed nude, revealing my mastectomy scars. We've received LOTS of feedback on it.

Yesterday, I spoke at length to a woman who wants to get a copy to give her daughter, who is a young preteen, perfectly healthy, but struggles with excema scars and thinks she needs to lose weight. I say, let's bring on the REAL cover girls and start to break down the belief systems of glamour and celebrity that damage our senses of self-worth so horribly.

This woman had contacted me because of my interview on a local Denver morning show, in which I talk about balancing on that tightrope wire between life and death, and how it's an untenable place. We all walk it, sometimes pretending its as vast and flat as a sandy desert, other times wobbling precariously as grief, fear, family trauma and reality conspire to knock us off into oblivion. While I'm glad we're mouthy and outspoken, it grieves me, daily, that I've been chosen for such a shitty spokesperson detail.

I struggle, also, daily, with feeling attractive or even feminine. So I got my nose pierced the other day. I'm feeling much better now.

My meditation for this day: May we be given the grace to dwell in the presence of the moment and the insight to find those things that truly bring beauty and hope. I've got an almost-family of robins outside my living room window. For today, I will enjoy the promise of life.

If you'd like to watch what I said about living with cancer, it's here:
 

I'm Heather

Hi, all! My name is Heather, and I'm the mother of four gorgeous girls, ages 10, 8, 6 and almost 4. I'm married to my first husband, Clark, who has been a tremendous rock through this unthinkable trauma, in spite of his own ongoing grief and sorrow. He, too, has had to deal with the loss of hope for the future.

I was diagnosed in May of 2008 with stage IV breast cancer, mets to the bones. It was ER+/PR+, Her-2 +. I began a regimen of carboplatin, taxotere, herceptin and zometa, once weekly for three weeks, off one week, for about five months. I responded very well to treatment, and have been NED since my third PET/CT in October of 2008. I had a double mastectomy and oopherectomy in November 2008, opted against breast reconstruction, then did a full treatment of radiation therapy. In March of 2009, I was done with the "huge" treatments and continued the maintence of the AI, Femara, that I had started in January of 2009.

I am now approaching my 2nd anniversary of diagnosis, and just had a PET/CT on February 23rd, which confirmed my continued NED status.

I publish and edit a literary magazine for mothers that I cofounded in 2006 called get born: the uncensored voice of motherhood. I started the magazine because I struggled so much with loneliness, disillusionment and guilt as a mother that I didn't ever want another woman to go through similar circumstances alone.

I live in the gorgeous state of Colorado, in the United States, but traveled a lot as a young girl; my parents were conservative missionaries in Ecuador, South America when I was in high school, and I treasure that experience and the expansion of my world view with which it provided me.

I look forward to sharing on this forum; may our collaboration be a beacon of hope for too many of us who are learning to live in the tenuous space between life and death. Shalom.

WELCOME!!

All women facing cancer are welcome to join this blog.

This blog will focus primarily on mothers who have advanced breast (or other) cancer.

As women, and mothers, who will be living with cancer for the rest of our lives (or until there is a cure), we form a unique community.

Living with cancer is always a challenge.

Raising kids, while living with cancer, is an even greater challenge.

Together, we can share our experiences, our concerns, and our support.

Together, we are strong.



Anyone interested in joining, should contact me at:
coffeeandchemo@gmail.com