Spreading the Word

Every time I speak, write, or talk about living with Stage IV cancer, it seems I am educating an entire public. This week, I got to go on TV to discuss the cover of my Spring issue, on which I posed nude, revealing my mastectomy scars. We've received LOTS of feedback on it.

Yesterday, I spoke at length to a woman who wants to get a copy to give her daughter, who is a young preteen, perfectly healthy, but struggles with excema scars and thinks she needs to lose weight. I say, let's bring on the REAL cover girls and start to break down the belief systems of glamour and celebrity that damage our senses of self-worth so horribly.

This woman had contacted me because of my interview on a local Denver morning show, in which I talk about balancing on that tightrope wire between life and death, and how it's an untenable place. We all walk it, sometimes pretending its as vast and flat as a sandy desert, other times wobbling precariously as grief, fear, family trauma and reality conspire to knock us off into oblivion. While I'm glad we're mouthy and outspoken, it grieves me, daily, that I've been chosen for such a shitty spokesperson detail.

I struggle, also, daily, with feeling attractive or even feminine. So I got my nose pierced the other day. I'm feeling much better now.

My meditation for this day: May we be given the grace to dwell in the presence of the moment and the insight to find those things that truly bring beauty and hope. I've got an almost-family of robins outside my living room window. For today, I will enjoy the promise of life.

If you'd like to watch what I said about living with cancer, it's here:
 

Hello there, I'm Teresa

My name is Teresa and I’m a 44-year old southern gal from Alabama. I have two wonderful children (Meghan, age 14; Jimmy, age 9), two beautiful cats, and two energetic mini-Australian Shepherds. I also have Stage IV breast cancer.

Originally diagnosed in February 2005 at age 39, I found the lump myself and had my first mammogram. Over the next two weeks I had a biopsy, ultrasound, lumpectomy, and subsequent mastectomy of my right breast (the tumor was larger than first thought and it had spread). At that time my cancer was graded Stage II (T2N2MO, ER+/PR+). By April I was on chemotherapy (A/C then Taxol) and a few months later I was given 28 radiation treatments. I lost all my hair and was very sick for months. Follow-up scans indicated the cancer was gone. I began taking Tamoxifen and hoped for the best.

Our family had big plans for the next year to do things we could not during my illness. We bought a new boat and the children were really looking forward to that summer. Unfortunately, my husband passed away in May 2006 from a heart attack in his sleep. He was only 47. Just as I was beginning to feel like myself again, my life fell spectacularly apart.

I made it through all of that somehow, and the children and I struggled to get used to life without their father. Being a single Mom is difficult at times and, thankfully, two years passed during which I continued to have a clean bill of health. Then in March 2008 I began to have severe back pain. My oncologist sent me for a scan and gave me some bad news: the cancer had returned and it was in my bones. I had tumors in my spine and in one hip. This changed my diagnosis to Stage IV and I was devastated. Fourteen radiation treatments were immediately scheduled due to the location of the tumors putting me at risk for spinal cord compression. After that I began monthly bone treatments (Zometa). My next scan was clean and I went back into remission.

Since then I have had two more recurrences and undergone chemotherapy both times (Ixempra, Doxil). I am currently receiving Abraxane due to very small tumors in two lymph nodes, my spine, one hip, and my liver. Two weeks after the first treatment, my hair began to fall out. Sadly I am bald again, but can feel the lymph node above my collar bone shrinking more and more. I am looking forward to my next scan and praying for a good report.

My life has been full of ups and downs these past five years. Sometimes I’m not quite sure how I made it through. I strive to look for the good in all things and try not to focus on my cancer too much. In spite of everything, I feel the Lord has blessed me tremendously. After all I am still alive, my children are happy and healthy, and I just became engaged to a wonderful, loving man (something I never expected in my wildest dreams considering my health issues). I will never give up hoping for a cure; but in the meantime, life will continue to go on and I plan to live it to the fullest while I’m here.

Getting To Know- Jo

Hello, my name is Jolene (yes, after the songs) but I go by Jo usually and I am the almost 35 year old proud mama of three heathen kiddos. My oldest son is 18 1/2 and in college, my only girl is 15, and my youngest son is newly 7. My husband and I will have been together 10 years this coming May. Boy time goes fast!

As far as cancer goes, my oldest two children and I have a rare genetic disorder called MEN2a. Basically it causes a rare thyroid cancer (medullary), adrenal tumors/cancer called pheochromocytomas, and we're finding out a bunch of fun non-cancerous things as well.

I'm not able to get chemo or radiation for my cancer so all we can do is cut out things until we're just not able to anymore. It's a harsh reality but I always know it could be worse. I am considered incurable which is why I'm on this blog. Like RivkA and the others, I will be living with this until it either beats me (I refuse!) or they find a cure. My oldest son has also tested positive for the adrenal cancer so I will be posting about his new struggles as well. I look forward to getting to know everyone and helping others with MEN2a.

Everything You Wanted to Know.... (about me)

Shalom Uvracha!!  (Peace and Good Blessings!!)

I am RivkA with a Capital A!

I'm 43 and married to my best friend (16 years).  Moshe and I have three kids:
Eldest daughter, age 15
Son, age 13
Youngest daughter, age 11

I moved to Israel right after college and, for years, I worked in informal education and tour guiding.  When my first child was born, I chose to be a full time, stay at home mom.  I loved being home with our kids, and being their primary caregiver. When my youngest entered second grade, I finally felt ready to re-enter the paid work force.  That's when I was diagnosed.....

In the summer of 2005, I was diagnosed with Stage ZERO, DCIS -- the earliest stage of this type of breast cancer, in which the cells are confined to the milk ducts and there is no risk that the cancer has spread.  I knew we were lucky to discover the cancer at such an early stage.  I told all my friends "I am the early detection 'poster child.'"

I had a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy.  All 8 nodes that were removed were clear, but the margins from the lumpectomy were not.  So I had a mastectomy and reconstruction (DIEP).

A year and a half later, I was done with cancer..... or so I thought.

In the summer of 2007, during a routine mammogram, an ultrasound revealed swelling in my lymph nodes.  Further tests revealed that the cancer had spread to my bones, liver, and lungs. I now had a diagnosis of stage FOUR breast cancer.  Everyone was in shock, including my doctors.

I jumped from being a "poster child" to being a statistical anomaly.  This was not supposed to happen.

It took me a while to understand that Stage IV is incurable.  For as long as I live, unless a cure is found, I will have breast cancer.  I have what the doctors like to label, "chronic cancer." 

Treatment is intended to halt growth/further spreading of the cancer.  There is no expectation that we will be able to get rid of all the cancer in my body.

The cancer responded well to my first treatments: Herceptin and Navalbine.  The tumors in my liver "disappeared" and the tumors in my lungs shrunk to the size of dried peas.  The tumors in my bones were "stable."

It also took me a while to understand that "stable" is a good thing.  I wanted to hear the word "gone."

After a little more than a year, the cancer started spreading again and I started taking Taxol instead of Navalbine.  When the neuropathy got too bad, I switched to Taxotere.

In the summer of 2009, an MRI revealed tumors all over my brain.  There were at least nine tumors, but we found them early.  One was 12-13 mm, the rest were all smaller than a centimeter.  I received 20 treatments of WBR (Whole Brain Radiation).  The radiation worked better than anyone expected and there is only evidence remaining from one or two tumors.

My treatment was completely switched over, and I now take Tykerb and Xeloda.  Both pills are taken daily, during a 3 week cycle.  I take 5 Tykerb pills every morning, without exception.  I also take 4 Xeloda pills in the morning and 4 at night, but these I only take for 14 days, followed by one "free" week, when I only take the Tykerb.  Then I start again; there are no breaks in between cycles.

I am also in a study about the new bone drug: Denosumab.  Once a month, I get a shot of this drug, to strengthen my bones and prevent breaks and fractures.

I have pain from the bone mets and take pain killers.  I am lucky that relatively mild pain killers are usually enough to dull the pain.

And that, as they say, is the end of that.

When I was diagnosed with mets, I started blogging (http://coffeeandchemo.com/). Initially, my goal was just to let family and friends know what is going on, so I would not have to spend all my time talking about cancer and could talk about topics that interested me more, like parenting, philosophy, Torah, etc.  I also hoped my blog would provide support to other families living with cancer.

As my blog developed, I realized it provided support and inspiration for a wide range of people, from all different ages and backgrounds.

I garner strength from my ability to make good things come out of a bad situation.

I plan to live with cancer for a long time... at least long enough for them to find the cure!

WELCOME!!

All women facing cancer are welcome to join this blog.

This blog will focus primarily on mothers who have advanced breast (or other) cancer.

As women, and mothers, who will be living with cancer for the rest of our lives (or until there is a cure), we form a unique community.

Living with cancer is always a challenge.

Raising kids, while living with cancer, is an even greater challenge.

Together, we can share our experiences, our concerns, and our support.

Together, we are strong.



Anyone interested in joining, should contact me at:
coffeeandchemo@gmail.com